The Politically Correct Caucus announced today their demands for the 2016 Olympic Games. “It is hurtful and unfair that some do not make the Olympic Teams but others do. It is equally unfair and hurtful that Gold Medals are awarded to only one person in each event.” The spokesperson went on to say: “such a system encourages excess effort and striving to do better than your neighbors, which is selfish and makes your friends look bad. These are not the community values we should be encouraging!”
the Politically Correct Caucus went on to put forth their demands:
- That Olympic Teams be selected by National lottery, with no qualifications or restrictions. “This gives all people an equal chance and is the only fair way to do it” said the spokesperson.
- That any training for the events be prohibited. “It would show individualism and lack of cooperation that is unhealthy” the spokesperson went on to say.
- That events be demonstrations of cooperation and not unhealthy competition. “We envision participants holding hands and crossing the finish line together, singing ‘Kum Bah Yah’ rather than trying to best one another. And of course everyone would get a gold medal! Is this not a better way? It would be a change for the better, and each citizen would have hope of getting on an Olympic Team!”